Medina - Addiction

                                                                     Medina "Addiction"
First and foremost, please listen to the above song for this to make any sense..

What is an addiction?  Is it what society has brought us all to believe, as an imperfection in ones physiological makeup based on something in our past, brought on by a heartache, or physical abuse, or an emotional problem in the past?  All in all, addiction, eats away at us all every day.  At this point your probably already shaking your head asking, what is he talking about?  

You may be a cigarette smoker, a pot head, a meth user, a heroin addict, alcoholic, an over eater, an overachiever at what ever you do(perfectionist), or sex, masturbation, pornography?  All are very real, and affect each and every one of us. But what is addiction to you?  Going back to my personal meth addiction problem, the word, was just thrown down at me, at the drop of a hat by everyone, your an addict, you have a problem, for granted, they were right, and even after admitting I had a "problem" I still question myself, and others who say they have an addiction.  For myself, it was a cloud, a far away land I could carry myself to believe that all my problems could disappear, for a few hours, days, weeks, months, or 4 years, and sure you all would notice I was falling off the cliff, but essentially, it was merely my hideaway from reality, sober life, what had I made for myself that was somewhat "happy" while I was sober, because I chose to ignore so many issues in my life.  Even if the issues were a quarrel with a family member, or insecurities, I chose to run, and by run, It was a 1cc insulin needle packed with .60 methamphetamine that I rammed in, and escaped, sometimes, repeatedly 5 times in one night, to just get out of this world.  Upon the comedown it was so seamlessly impossible to have the desire to get out of bed, and if I did, it was only to use the bathroom, and come back and fall out for another 2 days.  It got to an extent where I every time I left the house, and said, bye mom, well, that is if I had the respect at the time to even tell anyone I was leaving that I could see in her eyes that question : "am I going to see my son ever again", and I simply didn't care at the time, but of course, what crackhead would care, right?

Moving on...  what gives the average, cigarette smoker, or pot head, to tell someone who is an alcoholic, or heroin addict their issue is any more superior, or less detrimental than there's?  I know so many people who smoke cigarettes, and had come down on me for my meth addiction, and continual day to day struggle or relapsing, and I simply, laugh in their face.  think about it?  We all face addiction, but is yours any less of a problem because, you chose to take a higher path in your life, or because, you said no to the pipe many years ago?  I've spoken to so many fellow friends in recovery, and unless you've been down that road of shoving a needle in your arm, bleeding all over yourself, to then shove it back in alittle higher up, and have the fighting urge even in your sleep, then no matter how much you have google'd someone's addiction, you have no entitlement to the subject, but then again, if I were to come down on a pothead, wouldn't you tell me the same thing?  Anywho, this blog was a bit bitter, but, at the end of the day, it is what it is....