Been working on this for months, just needed to figure out the best way to put it together, however for my personally this has been one of the most eye opening people in my life and through the drug addiction. every time I look in the mirror, masturbate, get blood taken and see the scabbed veins, or see the burn marks on my shoulder and left hand from a pipe burning me, I want to constantly go back and thank this person. :).
Josh I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for coming into my life, and being that voice on the other end of the phone, and computer who brought me to terms with loving myself. Not too sure exactly sure at times what it was that went through my head half the time when we spoke... Most of the time I had enough meth in my system to kill a dinosaur, however somehow you were the one person, each time, I put myself in that state of mind, physically and mentally, I stayed in contact with. Can't even count how many times you sent me a text or called me, saying; "are you alone... can you play with yourself...(as you and I both know more specifically my ass)... amongst many more things in which... I won't even begin to explain, because you know very well what they are. I remember one afternoon sitting down on the laptop talking to you and I was stuck on my ex boyfriend at the time, and he was someone I was in a relationship with, that was pretty much based off of...."I can blow a bigger cloud of meth than you." I remember I was reconnecting with him, and we were hanging out smoking, and doing shots of GHB like the old times. I believe I broke down and cried in front of you while playing old songs that he had given to me on a CD that we had made together at one point, and through it all it made me see how much I was still crazy over the guy. .....and quite honestly I've lost my train of thought on that other than, being able to talk to you about my relationship with him was something that made me realize so much why I did what I was doing, and at the same time I was sitting there in front of you going through an empty baggie scraping it with a straw, or put a rock in the pipe in front of you on skype, and remember saying, "I want to quit, I'm so over this..." And I dont really think you ever said to me.... don't or do. However there has always been something about trusting in you and being able to... have been in that 'fucked up' state of mind, that made me feel safe, and the more we talked the more I started to see how much you seemed to care about me and my health. There was another afternoon I remember asking you...."Hey do you want to watch me shoot up!!!!" and I believe your response wasn't very positive. The amount of times, I had wished I was physically able to be with you even sexually the times I had shot up, was insane. But as time went on, even after our discussion on the phone when I was in the park somewhere masturbating practically because I was so fuckedup... in the off times, no matter how crazy our conversations had ever gotten, I knew it still hurt you ina way to see me do that to myself. "The drugs that is..." :) . Came to one point, can't honestly remember what exactly was my turning point other than, you were the only person other than my best friend Kurt who I had in my life who I couldn't wait to talk to every single day.... when I opened the computer, or checked my phone, I honestly constantly, even...today January 31st, 2012, check my phone, or my computer to see if your online because,,, the biggest thing honestly that hit home for me, was the constant reminder from you that.. I was beautiful, and that wasn't based on appearance it was based on hours of conversations and deep topics....and when I did choose to give up the drug, you said ONE THING TO ME...and that was.... if you ever pick this stuff up ever again, I will never talk to you. From that moment forward inexplicably I made it a point to look myself in the mirror, wash off the nasty smelling sweat from meth leaving my body, and starting eating a lot to gain my strength back and I got clean! Everyone else had been saying it to me, in other ways obviously, and I'm not sure if the whole,'my family is saying it, or my best friends are saying it]' nd im just over hearing it or if it was because... someone outside the situation who really didn't know much about me from the start... but took the time to invest the interest other than just a sexual object interest and made me come to realize I was important. Can remember the first smile on my face when you said to me the following week after I put the pipe down, "happy one week babe" even now finishing this blog I am smiling because, every week after you had continued to say, congrats its been another week. And for the person who hasn't been through an addiction or physically seen someone go through an addiction won't be able to relate to what that meant to me :) and I do want to thank you again from the bottom of my heart for being there..... nearly at every hour almost month after month, week after week, text after text, sitting there listening to every single word I had to say, and never judged me, never pushed me away, and embraced me... for what I was going through, and helped me turn my life around. Much love.
Michael
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
beautiful people.
What is our fear of someone with a mental illness, or physical disability, and furthermore are they disabled, or are people just that shallow that, at first glance you see someone who has a difficult time pulling together their thoughts and putting them into words, or you see someone walking behind a walker, whether there 30 or 60 or 6 years old, there a reject?
Over the past 20 years of my life, living in the United States, some of my closest friends have had autism, were born with cerebral palsy, and have a multitude of friends who, from either lack of oxygen at birth or other complications before they came into this world, had a genetic disorder from the start. Now how many of you are sitting here saying, 'Michael, your just being a two-faced shallow bitch, and being nice right now?' You know in response we all have our flaws, even I myself in the past had that habit where I would simply "STARE!" Are you the kind of person who when in a restaurant you scream at a mother who so tenderly loves her son with autism because he won't stop screaming, or in fact there may be someone with tourerettes and you find yourself, incoherently staring and jeering at that person.
Whether someone came into this world with one leg, one lip, half an eyelid, a partial circumcision, dry damaged hair, or a speech impediment, or someone who can't feed themselves or cant do anything without the help of others, were all people, and have emotions, and value and worth. Now if your too ignorant to appreciate people around you, God Bless! But there are people, including myself who still rely on standing in front of the mirror with a blowdryer and a can of hair spray for and hour and a half before I leave the house every day, and every last wrinkle on a shirt has to be pressed out before I'll go in public, and thats sometimes still not enough for me to feel loved and happy. You walk past people every day, who under no control were born differently, I won';t call it a disability, because I have seen many people who fight and work harder to get out of bed every day, who cover up the scars from abuse or cover their heads with a hat, to try and block out the outside world. There are people who wish so very myuch they could get up out of their wheel chair and stand in front of a mirror and pamper themselves, and wish they could go out into the world and grab a drink at a bar, or go down a water slide. So with that said, why is it, including myself are we so selfish, and self-righteous? Is it because nothing ever will satisfy us, simply because, we've seen life from our own eyes, and every one else is just in it, henceforth why we are ignorant? Not sure what compelled me to write this blog today, other than, next time you snicker, or jeer, or mock that person, just remember what bullying you've been through, remember how easy it was for you to get out of bed this morning, and I don't want this to sound like I have sympathy for anyone, thats not my message, the point is merely, dont knock those down around you who you have bo idea what they may have gone through or what they currently are dealing with,
Have a blessed day
Over the past 20 years of my life, living in the United States, some of my closest friends have had autism, were born with cerebral palsy, and have a multitude of friends who, from either lack of oxygen at birth or other complications before they came into this world, had a genetic disorder from the start. Now how many of you are sitting here saying, 'Michael, your just being a two-faced shallow bitch, and being nice right now?' You know in response we all have our flaws, even I myself in the past had that habit where I would simply "STARE!" Are you the kind of person who when in a restaurant you scream at a mother who so tenderly loves her son with autism because he won't stop screaming, or in fact there may be someone with tourerettes and you find yourself, incoherently staring and jeering at that person.
Whether someone came into this world with one leg, one lip, half an eyelid, a partial circumcision, dry damaged hair, or a speech impediment, or someone who can't feed themselves or cant do anything without the help of others, were all people, and have emotions, and value and worth. Now if your too ignorant to appreciate people around you, God Bless! But there are people, including myself who still rely on standing in front of the mirror with a blowdryer and a can of hair spray for and hour and a half before I leave the house every day, and every last wrinkle on a shirt has to be pressed out before I'll go in public, and thats sometimes still not enough for me to feel loved and happy. You walk past people every day, who under no control were born differently, I won';t call it a disability, because I have seen many people who fight and work harder to get out of bed every day, who cover up the scars from abuse or cover their heads with a hat, to try and block out the outside world. There are people who wish so very myuch they could get up out of their wheel chair and stand in front of a mirror and pamper themselves, and wish they could go out into the world and grab a drink at a bar, or go down a water slide. So with that said, why is it, including myself are we so selfish, and self-righteous? Is it because nothing ever will satisfy us, simply because, we've seen life from our own eyes, and every one else is just in it, henceforth why we are ignorant? Not sure what compelled me to write this blog today, other than, next time you snicker, or jeer, or mock that person, just remember what bullying you've been through, remember how easy it was for you to get out of bed this morning, and I don't want this to sound like I have sympathy for anyone, thats not my message, the point is merely, dont knock those down around you who you have bo idea what they may have gone through or what they currently are dealing with,
Have a blessed day
Sunday, December 4, 2011
through the cold fog
Not sure what it was or what called me to open the app on my iPhone and start writing, I'm not quite sure exactly what it is I'm writing about or what it is that I'm even thinking about other than the fact that for some reason I felt this wave of weakness and for some odd reason despite how incredibly amazing my life is going I'm not sure if I got the urge to want to use crystal meth again or if it was th offer from someone I talked online or...what :(. Just one of those moments and many of you addicts can relate. Is it the inner demon pulling me back from th ability to be happy or is it that fear or not sure exactly and I'm sure this isn't making any send what do ever except well to those of you who know me I may but I felt like I should at least write it seems to help me through it and despite everything even in the cold breeze I sit here and ask myself, do I want to keep running into the cold fog, where I don know where I'm going but the possibility in the back of my head says if you don't try how will you know of the fog clears up ahead or I can turn back and continue on a path that is so very familiar but yet so unfamiliar that it scares me to death to think I could evn grasp the concept or idea of wanting to turn back. I was planning on going out to a bar and getting hammered again tonight but I think I'm going to keep running despite the bitter cold and I will not turn back to my past of despair!
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
a little thing called life
Life is what you make it out to be, but what defines life, is it something that merely is word used to describe your every day routine, or is it more so personal in that it’s a depiction of your inner soul….
Many of you probably have already made it to work today, and are already finishing your second cup of coffee or maybe your on your way to get your cup of hot starbucks to start your day, or like myself your working from home. What routine do you follow do you wake up, pull up the NYTimes app on your phone, or like myself you have to check and see whose on Grindr. Breakfast may follow shortly thereafter, or you may hop in the shower, frantically dry off and throw on a fresh suit, spritz on the closest cologne fragrance in grasp and then wipe on some deodorant and gargle with mouth wash before heading out the door. We all have a routine we follow to start our day. For others it mayconsit of laying in bed all morning, maybe making a fresh pot of cheap coffee, having a frozen prefabricated, artificial overload flavored breakfast, and then catching up on reruns on the DVR before getting up to start your day.
For the longest time, I was an indvidual who would lay around in bed, and answer emails, and texts on my phone, amongst other distracting applications and before I knew it, the clock said 1pm. I usually showered, and then maybe ran out with a close friend of mine, to get a beer, and then came home just as mom was starting dinner, and then I’d be up til the crack of dawn bullshitting online. Amongst the many distractions I seemed to find comfort in, to sway away from “life” I said to myself for the past 3 years, what was I accomplishing, if anything at all? However solitiude is when you find yourself, regardless of the countless times in which I seeked approval in other aspects of my ‘life’, I never found myself. Approval was sought in so many areas, the simple acceptance from a random stranger at a bar, not even to listen to what the other person was saying, but merely the satisfaction, that someone wanted to listen to me. Sounds silly right? Well other than being self absorbed, I began to realize, what is it about my ‘life’ that I find so undesireable that I can’t seek out the positives in myself and succeed? I mean after all, I could be living a life of a poor Romanian boy on the streets of Oradea if my amazing parents didn’t adopt me, Mark and Lori Lloyd. Sometimes I stop and think during my times of sulking, what would my life be like, if I wasn’t given this amazing opportuinity here in America. At the same time, I am ever so thankful for everything my parents have done for me. In those down times, where I find myself in bed for three days without showering, or even moving from my bed, what do I have to be ungrateful for?
The weekend before thanksgiving, I actually splipped up with drugs, and went on a 4 day binge, I had an amazing birthday trip planned to come to New Jersey to spend time with friends, and celebrate my birthday. The days before, I was grouchy, and quite frankly what would any trip to the northeast do to make me happy. However, thinking back, the countless times I sulked and complained about life, why do I resort back to drugs. I think it has to do with that little word called ‘life’, which is far greater than a little mere word in our vocabulary. Going back to my days spent in bed til 1pm, I believe we condition ourselves nad become accustom to a way of living, and I suppose I told myself, based off of nothing anyone else said to me, that I didn’t really have one. Also many of you are aware of my passion to help those who have gone through a similar past as myself with the addiction process, and some say; ‘well Michael how are you qualified to start a non profit if in fact you slip up and relapse on drugs’ good question? In the same respect, someone offered you another chance when you were late to work, or didn’t finish something and nearly lost your position in the company you work for. Are they comparably valid, I’m not sure, but we all are entitled to happiness and the ability to succeed in life.
On my trip here in New Jersey I have become more aware of whats important in life, I have started a charity for my birthday to raise money for Hope & Help in Central Florida, as a birthday wish for anyone to donate anything they can to help those affected by HIV and AIDS. Its an amazing 501c3 organization and 90 cents to every dollar is turned around for good in the community they specialize in counseling and life coaching, as that is something I am very passionate about. Life as one chooses to see is it in my own words, up to you, personal, and sacred to you. I don’t think its about what you do, what you have or who you are, but more so how you see it, and those around you. I have found anew passion of raising money for charities, and this morning have signed on to be ateam leader for the AIDS walk in Orlando in March, I will be pulling together a team of 10 people and we each plan on raising atleast 100 dollars ☺. I challenge many of you to support me in this, as HIV and AIDS, as it is not as much a stigma as it once were, but is still a huge epidemic in our everyday lives.
Please direct your generosity and good energy here:
https://secure.kgihost.net/hopeandhelp.org/donate.php
In the "donation purpose" field, please enter "Michael Lloyd's Birthday request"
Together, we are saving lives and showing our neighbors affected by HIV/AIDS they are not alone!
Hope and Help Center of Central Florida, Inc. HIV/AIDS Awareness and Assistance, Orlando AIDS/HIV Te
secure.kgihost.net
The Hope and Help Center of Central Florida's mission is to save lives by treating and preventing the spread of HIV/AIDS in Central Florida. Orlando AIDS Testing, HIV/AIDS Education
Many of you probably have already made it to work today, and are already finishing your second cup of coffee or maybe your on your way to get your cup of hot starbucks to start your day, or like myself your working from home. What routine do you follow do you wake up, pull up the NYTimes app on your phone, or like myself you have to check and see whose on Grindr. Breakfast may follow shortly thereafter, or you may hop in the shower, frantically dry off and throw on a fresh suit, spritz on the closest cologne fragrance in grasp and then wipe on some deodorant and gargle with mouth wash before heading out the door. We all have a routine we follow to start our day. For others it mayconsit of laying in bed all morning, maybe making a fresh pot of cheap coffee, having a frozen prefabricated, artificial overload flavored breakfast, and then catching up on reruns on the DVR before getting up to start your day.
For the longest time, I was an indvidual who would lay around in bed, and answer emails, and texts on my phone, amongst other distracting applications and before I knew it, the clock said 1pm. I usually showered, and then maybe ran out with a close friend of mine, to get a beer, and then came home just as mom was starting dinner, and then I’d be up til the crack of dawn bullshitting online. Amongst the many distractions I seemed to find comfort in, to sway away from “life” I said to myself for the past 3 years, what was I accomplishing, if anything at all? However solitiude is when you find yourself, regardless of the countless times in which I seeked approval in other aspects of my ‘life’, I never found myself. Approval was sought in so many areas, the simple acceptance from a random stranger at a bar, not even to listen to what the other person was saying, but merely the satisfaction, that someone wanted to listen to me. Sounds silly right? Well other than being self absorbed, I began to realize, what is it about my ‘life’ that I find so undesireable that I can’t seek out the positives in myself and succeed? I mean after all, I could be living a life of a poor Romanian boy on the streets of Oradea if my amazing parents didn’t adopt me, Mark and Lori Lloyd. Sometimes I stop and think during my times of sulking, what would my life be like, if I wasn’t given this amazing opportuinity here in America. At the same time, I am ever so thankful for everything my parents have done for me. In those down times, where I find myself in bed for three days without showering, or even moving from my bed, what do I have to be ungrateful for?
The weekend before thanksgiving, I actually splipped up with drugs, and went on a 4 day binge, I had an amazing birthday trip planned to come to New Jersey to spend time with friends, and celebrate my birthday. The days before, I was grouchy, and quite frankly what would any trip to the northeast do to make me happy. However, thinking back, the countless times I sulked and complained about life, why do I resort back to drugs. I think it has to do with that little word called ‘life’, which is far greater than a little mere word in our vocabulary. Going back to my days spent in bed til 1pm, I believe we condition ourselves nad become accustom to a way of living, and I suppose I told myself, based off of nothing anyone else said to me, that I didn’t really have one. Also many of you are aware of my passion to help those who have gone through a similar past as myself with the addiction process, and some say; ‘well Michael how are you qualified to start a non profit if in fact you slip up and relapse on drugs’ good question? In the same respect, someone offered you another chance when you were late to work, or didn’t finish something and nearly lost your position in the company you work for. Are they comparably valid, I’m not sure, but we all are entitled to happiness and the ability to succeed in life.
On my trip here in New Jersey I have become more aware of whats important in life, I have started a charity for my birthday to raise money for Hope & Help in Central Florida, as a birthday wish for anyone to donate anything they can to help those affected by HIV and AIDS. Its an amazing 501c3 organization and 90 cents to every dollar is turned around for good in the community they specialize in counseling and life coaching, as that is something I am very passionate about. Life as one chooses to see is it in my own words, up to you, personal, and sacred to you. I don’t think its about what you do, what you have or who you are, but more so how you see it, and those around you. I have found anew passion of raising money for charities, and this morning have signed on to be ateam leader for the AIDS walk in Orlando in March, I will be pulling together a team of 10 people and we each plan on raising atleast 100 dollars ☺. I challenge many of you to support me in this, as HIV and AIDS, as it is not as much a stigma as it once were, but is still a huge epidemic in our everyday lives.
Please direct your generosity and good energy here:
https://secure.kgihost.net/hopeandhelp.org/donate.php
In the "donation purpose" field, please enter "Michael Lloyd's Birthday request"
Together, we are saving lives and showing our neighbors affected by HIV/AIDS they are not alone!
Hope and Help Center of Central Florida, Inc. HIV/AIDS Awareness and Assistance, Orlando AIDS/HIV Te
secure.kgihost.net
The Hope and Help Center of Central Florida's mission is to save lives by treating and preventing the spread of HIV/AIDS in Central Florida. Orlando AIDS Testing, HIV/AIDS Education
Friday, November 18, 2011
My Birthday/Christmas Wish to all of you.
For many of you the next few weeks to come are going to be strenuous, stressful, and above all, more blessed than any of us really can fathom at one given time. The holiday season is filled with joy, happiness, and showering of love and generousity. For myself for years, as many of you know I was blessed enough to have two of best parents in the world, anyone could ever ask for, Mark and Lori Lloyd, who adopted me from an orphanage, brought me to this country and offered me alife in which, I probably would have never had otherwise, every Christmas, was a morning with not one wink of sleep the night before, of course the following day was filled with baking cookies for santa, and dumping every last dusting of sprinkles on the floor for the sugar cookies, which at the time looked like crap but, it was always a tradition. Even now, we have the traditions reigning still, the family advent time after a great Sunday evening dinner, with our eggnog, in the same red christmas glass cups we've been drinking out of since we came together as a family. Over the years however as many of you also know I have made decisions, based on lack of self respect and poor judgement due to getting in with the wrong crowd, and getting into drugs, alcoholism, and sex addiction, although I realize these choices have altered my quality of life, only slightly though, I accept these, and again have been more than blessed with the oppportunity to have health insurance, and an amazing doctor and team to look at my HIV/Hepatitis C needs.
For my 22nd Birthday this year I would like to take the spotlight off me me, for the next 2 weeks, and as Worlds Aids Day is remembered on December 1st, I would like, any of you, who have followed me through this journey, those of you who have helped me over come obstacles, and those of you who have been by my side since day one, to donate whatever you can, perhaps even only a mere dollar, to Hope & Help, an organization in Central Florida, to help those who are in need in the community with HIV/AIDS. I know its not asking much, but to those unlike myself, who weren't offered the prestine life in which I was given so easily, and still have, to help out this organization so they can go out in the community, would more than anything bring tears of happiness to my eyes, and far exceed any birthday phone call, greeting, or any christmas card. Thank you all so much.
Love, Michael.
(UPDATED NOVEMBER 29TH)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z2re_SgPVm8&feature=youtube_gdata_player
Please direct your generosity and energy here.
https://secure.kgihost.net/hopeandhelp.com/donate.php
In the "donations purpose" field, please enter, "Michael Lloyd's Birthday request"
Together we are saving lives and showing our neighbors affected by HIV/AIDS they are not alone!
For my 22nd Birthday this year I would like to take the spotlight off me me, for the next 2 weeks, and as Worlds Aids Day is remembered on December 1st, I would like, any of you, who have followed me through this journey, those of you who have helped me over come obstacles, and those of you who have been by my side since day one, to donate whatever you can, perhaps even only a mere dollar, to Hope & Help, an organization in Central Florida, to help those who are in need in the community with HIV/AIDS. I know its not asking much, but to those unlike myself, who weren't offered the prestine life in which I was given so easily, and still have, to help out this organization so they can go out in the community, would more than anything bring tears of happiness to my eyes, and far exceed any birthday phone call, greeting, or any christmas card. Thank you all so much.
Love, Michael.
(UPDATED NOVEMBER 29TH)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z2re_SgPVm8&feature=youtube_gdata_player
Please direct your generosity and energy here.
https://secure.kgihost.net/hopeandhelp.com/donate.php
In the "donations purpose" field, please enter, "Michael Lloyd's Birthday request"
Together we are saving lives and showing our neighbors affected by HIV/AIDS they are not alone!
Saturday, October 15, 2011
HIV vs. Reality
I’ve been pondering on the ideal of the best way to express my thoughts on this, and in fact after speaking to someone in North Jersey, a new friend who has been positive for over a year, we discussed a lot of things, both of which agreed on the ideal that people have a stigma towards HIV, and that someone needs to stand and make a difference whether that’s through photography are through public speaking, community involvement, or cinematography. I want to work with my him to do a photo shoot project to depict how society views the HIV positive community, and the way the individual feels about themselves. Seldom do we think while were sitting at a dinner table on a date with someone there's so many things in which that go through out head, one of which are they poz, do they have anything, how big are they, are they lying to me, or is this the real deal? Unfortunately, we look past the common factor that, chances are more often than not there are people in that very restaurant who prepared your food for you, or handled the glass in which your red wine sits in. In addition, the man who opened the door at concierge at the hotel; or the secretary at the doctors office. As well as flight attendant who gave you your peanuts, or helped you put your suitcase in the over head bin The clerk at the boutique one loves to go to who rings them out with their purchase, why is it that, we forget that these very people either have one, an STD, or an auto immune deficiency disease. I think it's sickening to me. A majority of HIV positive people I am around, including that of myself are fully appreciative as life, and accepting that we have to take care of ourselves, which isn't too hard to do, and we can live a great life. I don't think its a death sentence people are afraid of, I think in young people more or less its the stigma in which they see how society treats it and when someone is diagnosed they feel cramped, and aren't sure who to go to. When you think about it, when your standing in church, following the ceremony with someone, or perhaps waiting line at your local chipotle for a burrito, again more often than not someone your close with has some kind of an STD, or knows someone directly with HIV, when you don’t know, why would it make a difference right? Unfortunately, and many can argue, but from experience when I have told people of my status, I get the, can you use your own towel from home, I get the oh don’t come in the kitchen, or don’t get too close to my baby thing, and the attitude does change, unfortunately.
Monday, August 29, 2011
We take life for granted
We take things for granted so much, today I was in the car on the way up with a friend from Palm Bay, and we were discussing family trips... and I think back, being blessed to go to London, Spain, and Morocco all in 1997, on 10 hours of flying, crying, screaming and complaining. The trip was based to learn arabic in Spain and reach out to the Muslims traveling across the mediterranean to Morocco about the gospel of Jesus Christ. Thinking back it was all short of boring, At the time I was obsessed with 747 jets, and we got to fly Virgin Atlantic, and it was a long 8 hour flight, I had my first passport, which was all new to me and was overjoyed as we got to Orlando International Airport we got our little messenger bags from the airline with sleeping masks, logo'd toothbrushes, and headphones and who knows what else they gave the kids. The flight was so long and overlooking the atlantic freaked me out.. but we got there, and it was an experience to never forget, the london taxi cabs, the double decker red buses, London Bridge, it all was magical within itself. But...unfortunately, looking back as me and my friend Carl talked about in the car today, I don't remember much. I remember the small details, like getting off the plain, but to remember the people, and absorbing the culture, and furthermore the experience of seeing the joy on Mom and Dad's faces would be something I wish I could go back to see. In the end of the Europe/Africa Missionary trip, we took a small ferry over to Tanger, Morocco and Mom and Dad both used to do missionary work, Dad lived in Uganda, Mom was in Nigeria and of course Morocco is no where near, but. I remember after the rocky boat ride, I looked down the railing and saw the look of happiness on Mom and dads face as we approached the coast and it was almost like they were coming home, but I remember then looked down at us and we were so incredibly happy and bouncing up and down, I just wish we could relive those little moments again.
Also thinking back there were little road trips on the way to Chicago to see Grandma and Mom's famly we stopped in Tennessee at some of the caves and such and hiked down, or on the trip to South Dakota to see Mount Rushmore, and driving through canyons and suddenly our car was surrounded by buffalo. To horse back ride in the Rocky Mountains and see elk. The small day trip me and Dad took to Mexico, all so small, but still was an awesome experience, one of whichthat I will never forget but wish I remembered.
Even my first flag football match and making my first goal, so silly and small but a memory of looking back and seeing Mom and Dad cheering with the biggest grins on their faces, and the high fives from the team. Every piano recital and practice Mom was there, and Every boyscout camp out and troop meeting Dad was there every step of the way, I'm sure thousands was spent on me and daniel to enjoy life and learn and become well rounded members of society, I wish I did those things now to be able to really appreciate them, but again life is too short.
Life is so short, and in the blink of an eye, your sitting in bed, 12 years later, with news that your Uncle who has lung cancer could not have much longer, and just the little things start to make you reminisce and appreciate... just a thank you Mom and Dad, for making me the richest person I know. I feel so incredibly blessed to have been able to travel the world, and be blessed, more than anyone is deservent, a life many would kill for to have a solid family. Thank you for giving me and Daniel the most amazing life we could ever wish for, even though we may not have appreciated it then... Thank you.
Also thinking back there were little road trips on the way to Chicago to see Grandma and Mom's famly we stopped in Tennessee at some of the caves and such and hiked down, or on the trip to South Dakota to see Mount Rushmore, and driving through canyons and suddenly our car was surrounded by buffalo. To horse back ride in the Rocky Mountains and see elk. The small day trip me and Dad took to Mexico, all so small, but still was an awesome experience, one of whichthat I will never forget but wish I remembered.
Even my first flag football match and making my first goal, so silly and small but a memory of looking back and seeing Mom and Dad cheering with the biggest grins on their faces, and the high fives from the team. Every piano recital and practice Mom was there, and Every boyscout camp out and troop meeting Dad was there every step of the way, I'm sure thousands was spent on me and daniel to enjoy life and learn and become well rounded members of society, I wish I did those things now to be able to really appreciate them, but again life is too short.
Life is so short, and in the blink of an eye, your sitting in bed, 12 years later, with news that your Uncle who has lung cancer could not have much longer, and just the little things start to make you reminisce and appreciate... just a thank you Mom and Dad, for making me the richest person I know. I feel so incredibly blessed to have been able to travel the world, and be blessed, more than anyone is deservent, a life many would kill for to have a solid family. Thank you for giving me and Daniel the most amazing life we could ever wish for, even though we may not have appreciated it then... Thank you.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)